Lessons from Literature: What's Your Soma?

Hi friends! Have you ever read a book that stood out to you and you can recall its lessons even years later? I have. I can recall multiple novels that have changed the way I view something, which brings me to a new blog series called Lessons from Literature. In this series, I will select a novel with a lesson or deeper meaning that can be applied to the therapy world or life itself.

The first book I'm featuring is 'Brave New World' by Aldous Huxley. Introduced to this dystopian novel in high school by a beloved English teacher, it's chock full of themes and has been compared to the novel 1984 for its relevance to today's world. While I won't spoil the novel for you (I really think it's worth the read), the basic premise is this: the story follows a few characters as they navigate a seemingly perfect society based on the principles of consumerism, collectivism, and a rigid caste system. Not surprisingly, there's a nasty underbelly and a sharp divide between the haves and have-nots. We see how even in a utopia, human beings still need 'something' to help them survive the disconnect they feel inside. And in Huxley's world, here comes the drug Soma. Here's an excerpt from the book that describes the feelings Soma invokes in people:

"And if ever, by some unlucky chance, anything unpleasant should somehow happen, why, there’s always soma to give you a holiday from the facts. And there’s always soma to calm your anger, to reconcile you to your enemies, to make you patient and long-suffering. In the past you could only accomplish these things by making a great effort and after years of hard moral training. Now, you swallow two or three half-gramme tablets, and there you are. Anybody can be virtuous now. You can carry at least half your morality about in a bottle. Christianity without tears—that’s what soma is." - Chapter 17, Brave New World

How does this relate to us, and the lessons we can take from literature? Perhaps the lesson is this: What is your Soma? What 'drug' do you use to "give you a holiday from the facts?" Is it food? Sex? Social Media? Porn? Alcohol? Weed? TV? Smutty romance novels? (Okay, this one hits a little too close to home!) What do you do when all you can do is just be? Like, when it is silent and you're alone with your thoughts, can you stay there? When you're riding the elevator to your office, can you just 'be' without looking down at your phone? When you're taking care of your children, can you just 'be' without having a glass of wine nearby? When you're lonely after another crappy date, can you just sit in the feeling without turning to a false reality for comfort? When you're outside and it's beautiful, can you just listen and breathe and notice the world as it is, or are you unable to let go of the Soma that is noise and music and podcasts and news stations?

Which Soma is keep you back from your goals? Because in the novel, soma is often consumed at greater and greater quantities to the detriment of the user and their perception of the world. In fact, I would argue that Soma is the thing that is keeping the people in the 'World State' from absolutely losing it. Doesn't the World State sound a lot like the modern day world we live in? Always moving at the speed of light, worried about consuming over creating, trying to separate love and joy from intimacy and connection, encouraging all of us to just keep our heads down, keep working, keep doing, keep going, and here, 'take this handy dandy drug so you can tolerate it.' The Soma, at its core, promises comfort and freedom from reality. This addiction to comfort above growth is part of what is holding you, and most human beings back. When we engage in disengagement, we stagnate. We mold. We wither. And, if we don't stop consuming, we become bloated and heavy in our comfort. Then, we lose our sight of empathy and our common humanity.

What can we do about this? Firstly, decipher what your Soma is. There are three clues I use with myself and with clients when I'm talking about something in my life becoming unbalanced or unhealthy.

1. When I am doing something hard or boring, or even something supposedly enjoyable, am I noticing a pattern in my behavior that is keeping me from just experiencing the moment in the here and now?

2. When I do this distracting thing (i.e. possible Soma), do I feel better or worse afterwards? Like, at the end of the day, when I review my life, am I glad I engaged in that behavior? Or do I feel guilt or shame as a result?

3. Is this behavior causing rifts in my relationships, my work, my health or my mood? Another way to ponder this question is "If someone were to tell you that you needed to cut down or cut back on this behavior, would you feel defensive, annoyed or angry?"

   
   

So I pose a challenge to you today, figure out what your Soma is, and work on replacing it with something else. Ask yourself, "What would I be doing if I were recovered from this addiction?" Don't focus on what you will lose, but put your sight on what you will gain. You may lose comfort, but you will redeem your resilience and growth for the future.

Take exquisite care of yourselves,

Megan

When Doubt Turns Into Desperation: A Peek into Obsessive Doubt and OCD

Hi friends! I hope you are doing well. Today, I'd thought we'd tackle a specific type of problem that shows up in the therapy room with many of my clients: obsessive doubt.

If you're curious about 'obsessive doubt,' think of it like super intense anxiety. It's when you can't stop worrying about what might happen in the future, or what could have happened in the past. Like, are you really in love? Did you pick the right partner? Could you have hurt someone without even knowing it? Did the doctor miss something during your check-up? Is the world gonna be okay? Will you have enough money? The person with obsessive doubt struggles to trust their senses, their memories, their actions, even themselves, at their very core.

When the uncertainty train leaves, it takes us to the land of obsession. This is where doubt turns into desperation. We start obsessing over things, creating stories in our heads that make us super anxious and scared about things that haven't even happened. And then, to feel better, we might start doing things over and over to try to feel safe and calm. Like... counting, or googling, or asking our best friends to listen to us describe how much we love our partner and all the reasons why, or creating budget sheet after budget sheet to make certain you have enough money. Compulsiveness can look like reading the news multiple times per day, scanning for 'feel-good' articles to prove to yourself that there's still good in the world, but then distrusting them when you do read them, because after all, there's so many bad, awful terrible news stories out in the world, too.

Make no mistake, people who aren't in therapy have doubts, too. All people do. But most humans have doubts that they can then turn off or move away from, because they know living in fear and doubt keeps them stuck, paralyzed, unable to move forward.

Let's use one of the doubt-based questions above: "What if the doctor missed something at my last wellness check up?" What is the potential consequences of this happening? The person plagued with this doubt might find themselves struggling not to overreact, and their inner monologue might sound something like this,

"I just noticed a strange mole on my body, and I went to the doctor last week and they looked at it and said it seemed fine, that it didn't meet the criteria for any further testing. They're a great doctor, and I usually trust them, but what if? What if they missed something at my check up? What if it's melanoma and I am completely at stage four and it's terminal and I die? I once read a news article where a women's melanoma was underneath her skin and she didn't start showing signs until it was too late. I'd feel like I let my family down if I don't get this checked out again and I die and leave them all here without me. I better go google pictures of melanoma for the next two hours, while I wait for the doctor's office to call me back so I can go back for a biopsy."

Does the above story sound familiar? Maybe your anxiety or doubt doesn't hang its hat onto that particular hook.

Maybe you instead are terrified of making the wrong decision in future colleges, careers, life partners, places to live, etc. Perhaps you find yourself awake at night laying next to your loving, kind, thoughtful partner of 23 years and you're suddenly struck with the thought, "What if I don't love them enough?" And then you can't stop worrying about that. If you don't love them 'enough,' then don't they deserve to be with someone who can love them better? What if you have to get divorced because you don't love them enough?' When you can't get this thought to calm down, then you rush into googling, 'How do you know you love your partner enough?' The search results spike your anxiety further though, because the first article that pops up is titled, "When Love isn't Enough." Cue the pounding heart, the dry mouth, the tears, the nausea in your stomach.

See how quickly things can escalate? Whew! I was starting to get a bit nervous just thinking about it. But at the core of all these uncertainties is the basic question: "Am I secure?" Our minds are always on the lookout for potential threats, and you know what's risky? Stepping into new areas of your life. Anxiety acts as a signal, reminding you to recognize your current needs, which usually involve safety, assurance, and confidence in yourself and your perceptions. It's crucial to trust what you can see, feel, touch, taste, and know in the present moment, and rely less on your imagination, which often creates doubts to steer you towards safety and away from danger.

The next time you experience a thought like the ones above, or even one that sounds like a statement, ask yourself "What else could it be?" This question will open your mind to the other possibilities, and maybe, just maybe, give you a chance to breathe in a tiny bit of air before you allow the doubt to drag you underneath the rough, choppy waves of uncertainty. Life is uncertain, and the thing is, none of us make it out alive, but we can still make it good. We can still make it good.

And if you find yourself needing further support or intrigued by this blog post, I'm always just an email or a text message away to get you started on the treatment you need to help you heal in the midst of doubt and fear.

Take exquisite care of yourself,

Megan

EMDR Intensives: Transformative and Targeted

Is Trauma Still Holding You Back? Discover the Transformative Power of EMDR Intensives

After years of talk therapy, does it still feel like trauma has a grip on you, keeping you stuck in a loop of hypervigilance, sleepless nights, or nightmares? Maybe you find yourself reliving painful memories, feeling disconnected in relationships, or even resorting to impulsive actions just to feel something—anything. EMDR intensives go beyond talk, combining eye movement therapy with somatic work to help you finally complete the threat response cycle—a natural reset our bodies need to feel safe and whole. In just a few focused sessions, you can break free from trauma’s hold, reconnecting with your true self, and welcoming in the creativity, spontaneity, and freedom you’ve been longing for.

How EMDR Works to Release Trauma

Think of your brain as having its own personal “secretary,” in charge of filing away all your memories. When trauma happens, though, it’s as if this secretary is overwhelmed and just shoves memories into files based on what they “feel” like rather than putting them in the right place. This is why certain memories trigger intense reactions even if they don’t seem directly related—they’re all lumped together under a similar feeling or belief, like “I’m not safe” or “I’m powerless.”

EMDR, or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, helps the brain’s “filing system” organize those memories properly. Using bilateral stimulation (BLS)—such as eye movements, tapping, or sounds—EMDR engages both sides of the brain to support the natural processing and integration of traumatic memories. As we work through these memories, they’re moved out of those emotionally reactive files into a place where they feel neutral and manageable.

Shifting Self-Beliefs and Finding New Perspectives

In each EMDR session, we’ll also explore the beliefs that have been “filed” with these memories. Trauma often leaves behind limiting beliefs like “I am not safe” or “I am powerless,” which can color your view of yourself and the world. EMDR gently challenges these beliefs, helping replace them with perspectives that support your current life. You might shift from “I’m not safe” to “I am resilient” or from “I am powerless” to “I have control over my life.”

By creating space for both physical processing and belief transformation, EMDR can release trauma’s grip, bringing lasting relief, resilience, and a sense of calm you can carry forward.

Why Choose an EMDR Intensive?

For many, traditional therapy can feel like slow progress, especially when dealing with deeply rooted trauma. EMDR intensives offer an alternative path, with research supporting the effectiveness of these focused sessions to deliver faster, longer-lasting relief.

• Accelerated Healing Supported by Research: Studies, such as those by van der Kolk et al. (2007), have shown that EMDR intensives can significantly reduce symptoms of PTSD in shorter timeframes compared to traditional therapy models. One study found that over 75% of participants experienced a substantial reduction in symptoms within just a few intensive sessions, highlighting the rapid transformation possible with this approach.

• Fewer Disruptions, Greater Cohesion: Weekly therapy can feel like starting and stopping, which can interrupt the brain’s processing. Shapiro (2001), the originator of EMDR, emphasized that an intensive approach helps maintain a cohesive reprocessing experience, fostering what researchers call a “momentum effect” that supports faster integration of traumatic memories.

• In-Depth, Supportive Work: EMDR intensives allow for more sustained focus and deeper processing. In a study by Ehlers et al. (2010), trauma survivors who engaged in intensive trauma therapy experienced greater symptom reduction and maintained these improvements at follow-up sessions, suggesting that intensives provide a durable path to relief.

• Better Fit for Busy Schedules: Intensive therapy also offers flexibility for those with demanding schedules. Research from the Journal of Traumatic Stress (2013) found that intensive trauma-focused therapy is not only effective but also a time-efficient option for clients unable to commit to long-term weekly sessions, offering transformative results without long-term scheduling challenges.

• Enhanced Mind-Body Integration: Addressing the somatic aspects of trauma is key to complete healing. Studies in somatic psychology, like those by Ogden & Fisher (2015), indicate that integrating body-based approaches in trauma therapy helps individuals complete the natural threat response cycle, restoring a balanced nervous system and freeing up space for creativity, joy, and resilience.

EMDR Intensive Programs to Fit Your Healing Journey

Every journey through trauma is unique, so I offer different EMDR intensive options tailored to meet specific needs and goals. Each program includes a one-hour intake appointment the week prior, where we’ll create a customized treatment plan and take a thorough history to prepare for your intensive. Here’s a look at each program, including pricing:

• Half-Day Intensive - $699 Perfect for targeted focus on a specific issue. If you’re looking to address a particular memory or event that’s been holding you back, the Half-Day Intensive might be your best fit. This 3-4 hour session provides focused EMDR work to help your brain reprocess a single traumatic event or a specific painful memory. Clients often choose this option if they have a clear target in mind and want a safe, structured environment to work through it thoroughly without committing to a full day.

• One-Day Intensive - $1199 Ideal for diving deeper into multiple layers of trauma. The One-Day Intensive is designed for those ready to tackle more complex or layered trauma. In a full day (about 6-7 hours with breaks), we’ll address multiple memories or beliefs that are keeping you feeling “stuck.” This is an excellent choice if you’re ready for a more immersive experience that allows us to work through deeper patterns of distress and help shift those negative beliefs toward a more balanced, empowered perspective.

• Multi-Day Intensive - $2499 For those with complex trauma or deep-seated patterns needing a comprehensive approach. If your trauma feels intricate and multifaceted—perhaps affecting various aspects of your life or stemming from prolonged experiences—the Multi-Day Intensive offers a fully immersive healing experience. Over the course of 2-3 weekends, we’ll work through your trauma at a pace that supports deep and lasting change, with ample time to reprocess multiple memories and beliefs. This approach allows us to work through significant layers, reinforcing new, healthier perspectives and gradually integrating progress into your daily life, all while respecting your unique rhythm and capacity for healing.

  
  

Ready to Begin Your Healing Journey?

If you’re ready to move past the weight of unresolved trauma and step into a life of resilience, creativity, and freedom, an EMDR intensive could be the perfect fit. Schedule your intake appointment today to get started with a customized plan tailored just for you.

Reach out to info@giftofgritcounseling.com to book your appointment, or feel free to contact me with any questions. Let’s take this step together and help you reclaim the peace and spontaneity you deserve.